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[bottledblond]

Not every universe in the far and wide cosmos is as lucky (however unlucky itself that seems) to encounter Thanos during a time where people live who can do something about it. Steve Rogers, a particular version of Steve Rogers who had only just suffered through his first night of basic training in New Jersey as part of the Army’s Project Rebirth and thus had not yet become Captain America, bent to untie his shoes and saw his hands begin to disintegrate. He doesn’t panic, panicking is for people who do not live like every breath is their last. Instead, he blinks in surprise as the barracks fill with shouting. He has time to contemplate two things. One, he wishes he’d done more with his life. And two, he hopes Bucky will do all right.

He’s still thinking about that last issue when he exhales his last in a universe where Captain America never existed and finishes it bent over in the ruins of the barracks, roof half open to the sky and walls a burnt and ashy gray.

It takes him an hour to get to the road and by then, his asthma is already getting the best of him. He blacks out for the second time ‘that day’ and wakes up staring at the ceiling of what is obviously a hospital.

It just doesn’t sound or smell like a hospital. Sure. People are running around and yelling, but it smells painfully clean, artificially so, and there are machines he’s never seen before connected by wires to his body. He does the thing people should never do and yanks them loose. The machines squawk strangely and frantically and Steve is almost out of bed when two large men in green pajamas force him back.

Nothing makes sense to him for days. People come to talk to him, to find out who he is and who his family is. Evidently Steve Rogers is a popular name, because they bring in more people to talk to him, to ask him questions about his life, but no one has any answers.

He explodes, as he’s wont to do when frustrated, demands answers, but nothing they say makes sense.

By then, the war is over. Not World War II, which has evidently been over for over half a century, but this new war. And Bucky Barnes had been told of his presence. Steve is in bed, arms crossed, looking dour and getting an infusion of something that honestly is helping him breathe better when Bucky bursts into his now private room. It’s been two months

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[woundedwinter]

Steve's always been a great artist and Bucky tips his head to look at the swift scratching of graphite on paper. "That's really good." Right down to the tight line of his shoulders and Sam's angry stance.

What the fuck was he missing?

Then he reminds him about training and Bucky grins easily. "Yeah, yeah. I won't forget. Once we're settled tonight we can keep going." Sam may not believe in training Steve up, but Bucky does.

[bottledblond]

Sam’s just afraid of hurting Steve. They might have him on monthly infusions for his early onset rheumatoid arthritis and two months in a back brace had done wonders to correct portions of his spine, but he knows the medical rap sheet on Rogers. The heart condition, the asthma, the concave chest, the reduced lung capacity...

Steve Rogers should be wrapped up in bubble paper and run missions through Redwing. He should not be their point man anymore.

Sam cares too. Just not as recklessly as Bucky does.

“I’m holding you to it,” Steve says, licking the tip of his pencil the way he always used to do. The graphite isn’t poisonous, but it’s also not soft enough to lose its shape. It’s just habit from having to work with nubs of pencils Bucky would bring home from the gym after there was a boxing match.

[woundedwinter]

"You know you don't have to do that anymore, right?" His voice softens a bit. Bucky will always worry about Steve. It's who he is.

He also knows holding Steve back is like trying to hold back the tide. It won't work so it's up to him to keep Steve as safe as possible.

And find what he's looking for. Maybe he can set something right. Call it making amends and then some for his past.

[bottledblond]

“Old habits,” Steve says. He closes the book, the pencil left inside of the page he had been working on. He can do the rest from memory later, or more likely, he’ll want to do something else and leave this page unfinished.

A lot of Steve’s old sketchbooks are like that, life happening in the way of his art.

They get the landing signal a few hours later and Steve rubs at his ears as they refuse to release the pressure inside of them right away.

He’s still rubbing at them in the car Sam’s arranged to take them... well. Steve doesn’t actually know where. “What’s the plan?” He asks from the backseat, the only one who could comfortably fit back there, pulling himself forward with his arm around the headrest and Bucky’s shoulder.

[woundedwinter]

Bucky pulls a pack of gum from his pocket and offers it back to Steve without him having to ask.

"There are people like me, supersoldiers. I think they're involved with HYDRA, so we're going to talk to someone who might know more about their secrets than I do."

Bucky takes a breath and rests his hand on Steve's wrist. "I need you to step back on this one. This guy, he set up some pretty bad shit a long time ago. He framed me for a bombing and broke the Avengers apart."

"I know you want to help, but I need you to listen with Sam and stay back. Just this once."

There Sam. See? He can try and pull Steve back when he needs to.

[bottledblond]

Sam might be happy to hear Bucky say those things, but the situation still leaves a bad taste in his mouth. As he glances at Steve pop the piece of gum in his mouth to try and work out the pressure, the younger man’s arm still firmly in place over Bucky’s shoulder from the backseat, he snorts.

“That’s sugar coating things. He triggered the Winter Soldier and framed you for killing Wakanda’s king. Oh, and then rescuing your ass put me on the No Fly List for two years and eventually got me thrown in jail so—“

Sam glances at the frowning face in the backseat. “Me and your pal here aren’t always friendly but we are on the same side of things and I’d do it again if you asked me to,” he says.

Steve is sharp. He catches that ‘if you ask me to’ immediately. So Sam risked his life to save Bucky because of Steve.

Damn. Their relationship really is complicated.

“The guy we’re going to see is Zemo. Former baron or some shit. He’s bad news. Smart. And wants to take Bucky and all of the super soldiers out of the equation. But— Like hell am I letting you go see him alone,” Sam turns towards Bucky. “I see what you did there. Good try.”

[woundedwinter]

Bucky stiffens, "That's enough." It's not that he wants to protect Steve from his ugly past as much as he'd rather not talk about it. T'Challa and him are fine and that's what matters, damnit.

His eyes narrow because he catches what Sam said as fast at Steve did.

Because it's about what Steve wanted, not what he needed.

So he calmly gives Sam the finger because it's easier and more friendly than punching him.

"You're gonna hang back on this one, pal. I know you don't want to but it's safer."

[bottledblond]

Steve pulls his arm back almost thoughtfully. “Just want to remind you that I’m still an adult,” he says, somewhat stiffly. It’s more to do with the way Sam glances at him and the tension in the car than anything Bucky is doing. “I can understand that not everything is going to be possible for me to ride in on.”

Bucky is babying him a little. Steve’s flip flopped through the years between liking the attention and very much not liking it at all.

“You both can stop arguing about what I can and can not do, too. We can discuss it like men. Together.”

If either looks back at him, he’ll have an icy stare to share.

“It’s a prison. It’s safe inside. But Buck obviously wants to face this guy alone, so Sam and I will wait in the car for you. Okay? Good.”

[woundedwinter]

He absolutely doesn't feel a swell of pride at his dress down of the both of them. Nope. But he can't help but smile a little and glance at Steve in the mirror, all fire and anger and so very perfect.

"Yeah," and he only just stops himself from calling him Stevie, "that's the plan. I go in, you two watch point."

[bottledblond]

When Bucky gets out of the car, check point crossed and the OK given, Steve moves to the front seat beside Sam. He chews in the gum like a cow chewing cud and glances at the man beside him.

“I don’t have friends,” he says, very seriously. “Except for Bucky. I know I have a mouth on me. And I say it the way it is. People don’t like that. But I don’t think I’d have changed too much, personality wise, from the way I am now to the guy you knew. I know war can change people. And it can change people by a lot. I never went to war. But I’m still that person.”

Steve frowns down at his knees.

“What I’m saying is that if you put up with my nonsense enough to be my friend before, then you can put up with it now too. I want to be friends, Sam.”

He can feel something radiating from the man beside him and they both smile together. “Good. I’d like that.”

By the time Bucky is back from his visit, Steve and Sam are laughing, as fast of friends as they had been before.

[woundedwinter]

Bucky is a mess of tension as he leaves the cell to find Sam and Bucky. He's getting deeper and deeper into the mire and it feels oddly like choking on ice and electricity all over again.

But seeing Sam and Steve laughing?
Fuck.
It loosens everything in his chest and he doesn't feel like he needs to prove himself. He exhales as he gets back to them.

"Having fun?" He's not jealous, not all. He's happy that they're okay.

[bottledblond]

Big blue eyes snap to attention immediately and Steve leans out of the passenger side window. “Are you okay?” he asks. “Did he give you anything to go on?”

Also, Steve has shotgun now. He’s not getting out. Bucky can revert to the backseat again.

He has no idea that it’s a familiar place for him to be. At least the car isn’t a subcompact.

[woundedwinter]

"No," because he's not okay. Not at all. That bastard knows how to work his insecurities and his anger. "Yeah. I got a name and a place to start."

He slides into the back seat and rubs his eyes. That had been too much. Too intense.

"We'll need to get in the air again."

[bottledblond]

The smile dissolves from Steve’s face. He wants to shift to the backseat and be a comfort but not in front of Sam. Bucky will want his dignity. Steve just buckles himself in, and gazes at Bucky’s partial reflection in the side mirror.

Sam does the same in the rear view.

“Gotta tell me where so I can see what’s leaving the base first,” Sam says. He already has his phone out.

[woundedwinter]

Bucky needs time to think, to pull himself out of his own head so he's grateful for the privacy and the space.

"Germany. The doctor who made the serum is in Germany." He lists out a half dozen locations Sam can arrange transport to.

Serum. His mind keeps tripping over the idea and Sam will kick his ass for it but he doesn't care.

[bottledblond]

You’re telling me that there is actually more of this stuff? Shit. It’s being mass produced? Shit,” Sam curses, making Steve smirk at him. The double cussing is just funny to him.

He doesn’t mind another trip, though the airplane doesn’t hold as much joy for him now that he knows his ears aren’t too fond of landing.

He’s just about to turn to ask about their destination when Sam slams on the breaks. He can almost feel the belt cutting into his chest.

“I’m sorry, Barnes, did you say Madripoor? Yeah, no. We’ll have to drop in. Are you crazy?”

Steve exhales, rubbing his chest. “Where’s that?”

“It’s an island of pirates and thieves,” Sam frowns.

“Oh.” He turns towards Sam, and Bucky behind him. “We’re going right?”

[woundedwinter]

He shoots Sam a flat look, "I've been there before. My pardon was never made public, I can get in and find out what's going on."

Only.. "I can't go alone. I was never alone in the past. Even if I claim to be a freelance merc, I can't do it solo. It would cause problems."

[bottledblond]

“You want me to pretend I’m your handler?!” Sam’s head is going to turn around on his neck. “That sounds like bad news all around. The trigger might be gone... Buck, I’m saying this as a friend, it’s a bad idea,” Sam pleads.

Steve doesn’t actually know what’s going on. He looks between the two, feeling uncomfortable without knowing everything that’s going on.

[woundedwinter]

"None of this is a good idea," he challenges, still tense and angry from his visit inside. "But it's the best option we have."

He looks out the window, jaw tight. "It can't be you. They only gave me blonde male handlers." Using his weakness for Steve against him for all those decades.

"It'd have to be Steve."

And he really hopes that Sam doesn't crash the car as a result.

[bottledblond]

Sam is so glad he pulled over.

“No. Steve, no offense, but you don’t have a mean bone in your body. You’d never pull it off. And might I remind you that we have no way of getting to Madripoor? And I’m an Avenger?”

Because all of those things matter.

“Do you just happen to have a spare quinjet laying around?!” The answer to that question is yes. Tony left Bruce Banner everything.

[woundedwinter]

"We call Bruce. He'll get us a jet and we can get in." Banner has access, resources and if it's mentioned that the serum is about to hit the market, he'll want to help stop it.

A frustrated sound, "I know this plan sucks but it's all I have right now!" He closes his eyes and uses one of the stupid breathing exercises to bring his pulse down.

"Get us to a hotel. Steve needs to be brought up to speed and we to call Bruce about transportation."

[bottledblond]

The drive to the hotel is met with a lot of quiet and a lot of frustrated, angry grunting between the driver and the back seat. Steve isn’t sure what to think so he just starts scribbling the things he knows and the blanks that need to be filled.

He doesn’t look intimidating but people often overlook him. Or don’t see him at all. He can build a mob boss sort of persona around that. He’d grown up during prohibition after all.

The hotel Sam gets them is gorgeous by Steve’s standards. There are two beds and a table and a balcony that he immediately makes a beeline too.

He knows the other two men are having issues with this but Steve is determined to pull them all out of this funk.

He has no idea that it’s something the old Steve would also be planning. Take charge. Stop the bullshit.

[woundedwinter]

He doesn't speak, gaze distant as he tries to keep from falling into memories of the past. They check in and he drops his bags. Steve can see the balcony but he's got to look over the security, check lines of sight and the integrity of the doors.

Bucky has to check them twice before he digs out his phone.

"Call Banner. We need to start planning."

[bottledblond]

“Aren’t you two friends?” It’s not that Sam and Bruce aren’t... it’s just that Sam always get like a secondary Avenger. A runner up. And Bucky was never an avenger but he’d been friends of sorts with the guy’s husband over the course of the Blip.

Still, he accepts the phone to make the call and watches Steve outside looking over the railing for a little while longer before he steps into the hallway leading towards the bathroom.

Steve is a lot calmer than the other two, and gives Bucky a smile as he joins him. “I know you’re worried. You don’t want to be that man you used to be. But I’m with you. I’ve got your back. Always, Buck.”

[woundedwinter]

"I can't.." he bites out as he drags a hand through his hair. He's struggling as it is and he still feels like he failed Bruce when he couldn't protect Tony in the end.

They talk once in a while, but he's trying to get better about recognizing when he's having a hard time.

"That's the thing," he huffs out. "I didn't have a choice. They could just say a set of trigger words and I would.. go away. It was like sinking into ice."

"I never wanted to kill or hurt those people. But I did. I remember all of them." Steve will have to know, if they're going to try this.

He gives him a strained smile. "I know Stevie, and that means more to me than I can tell you."